HomeWWE Austin Texas. Bad Santa vrs Good Santa(Black guy Mark Henry good Santa) wins match and saves Christmas LOL
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For Bob
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2 Re: For Bob 12/23/2013, 11:16 pm
Guest
Guest
Real Americans now fighting Ole Ole the Mexicans. I have to start watching it again. Damn good.
3 Re: For Bob 12/23/2013, 11:22 pm
TEOTWAWKI
Just a quick Threadknapping for you Mr. Ichi...
A new teacher was trying to make use of her psychology courses. She started her class by saying, 'Everyone who thinks they're stupid, stand up!' After a few seconds, Little Larry stood up. The teacher said, 'Do you think you're stupid, Larry?' 'No, ma'am, but I hate to see you standing there all by yourself!'
Larry watched, fascinated, as his mother smoothed cold cream on her face. 'Why do you do that, mommy?' he asked. 'To make myself beautiful,' said his mother, who then began removing the cream with a tissue. 'What's the matter, asked Larry 'Giving up?'
The math teacher saw that Larry wasn't paying attention in class. She called on him and said, 'Larry! What are 2 and 4 and 28 and 44?' Larry quickly replied, 'NBC, FOX, ESPN and the Cartoon Network!'
Larry's kindergarten class was on a field trip to their local police station where they saw pictures tacked to a bulletin board of the 10 most wanted criminals. One of the youngsters pointed to a picture and asked if it really was the photo of a wanted person. 'Yes,' said the policeman. 'The detectives want very badly to capture him.' Larry asked, "Why didn't you keep him when you took his picture?"
Little Larry attended a horse auction with his father. He watched as his father moved from horse to horse, running his hands up and down the horse's legs and rump, and chest. After a few minutes, Larry asked, 'Dad, why are you doing that?' His father replied, 'Because when I'm buying horses, I have to make sure that they are healthy and in good shape before I buy.' Larry, looking worried, said, 'Dad, I think the UPS guy wants to buy Mom!'
A new teacher was trying to make use of her psychology courses. She started her class by saying, 'Everyone who thinks they're stupid, stand up!' After a few seconds, Little Larry stood up. The teacher said, 'Do you think you're stupid, Larry?' 'No, ma'am, but I hate to see you standing there all by yourself!'
Larry watched, fascinated, as his mother smoothed cold cream on her face. 'Why do you do that, mommy?' he asked. 'To make myself beautiful,' said his mother, who then began removing the cream with a tissue. 'What's the matter, asked Larry 'Giving up?'
The math teacher saw that Larry wasn't paying attention in class. She called on him and said, 'Larry! What are 2 and 4 and 28 and 44?' Larry quickly replied, 'NBC, FOX, ESPN and the Cartoon Network!'
Larry's kindergarten class was on a field trip to their local police station where they saw pictures tacked to a bulletin board of the 10 most wanted criminals. One of the youngsters pointed to a picture and asked if it really was the photo of a wanted person. 'Yes,' said the policeman. 'The detectives want very badly to capture him.' Larry asked, "Why didn't you keep him when you took his picture?"
Little Larry attended a horse auction with his father. He watched as his father moved from horse to horse, running his hands up and down the horse's legs and rump, and chest. After a few minutes, Larry asked, 'Dad, why are you doing that?' His father replied, 'Because when I'm buying horses, I have to make sure that they are healthy and in good shape before I buy.' Larry, looking worried, said, 'Dad, I think the UPS guy wants to buy Mom!'
4 Re: For Bob 12/23/2013, 11:31 pm
Guest
Guest
Little Larry came home from outside and caught his Mom and Dad getting it on in the bed room. "Dad" He yelled "What are you doing to Mom? His Dad was rattled for a answer so he said " I er, well i ......am filling Mamas gas tank"Larry said. "Well she sure doesnt get very good mileage the UPS man just filled her up a hour ago"
5 Re: For Bob 12/23/2013, 11:35 pm
Guest
Guest
Army Vet humor. I wrote this a little while ago for some old friends from the 12th Field station
(Guys that copied Morse code were nick named "Diddy Boopers)
A early Christmas present to all my friends from the 12th
Twas the Night before Christmas Poem..... McGoo Speaks
Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the ops
All the creatures was stirring, even those we called diddy bopps.
The cans(ear phones) were removed from their racks with care,
In hopes that St Nicholas soon would be there.
The diddy boppers were nestled snug in their chairs,
While visions of No QRM(static) danced in their lair.
And Sargent in his khakis, and I in my cap,
Had just come on duty, so no chance of a nap.
When up on the roof there arose such a clatter,
I jumped from the desk to see what was the matter.
Away to the snack bar I flew like a flash,
Tore open the door and gave it a smash.
With a little old soldier, so lively and quick,
I knew in a moment it must be Sgt Nick.
More rapid than eagles his coursers they came,
And he whistled, and shouted, and called us by name!
"Now Tom! now, Dennis! now, Mike and Billy!
On, John! On, Tozzie! on, on Stephen and Willy!
To the top of the roof! to the top of the wall!
Now dash away! Dash away! Dash away all!"
And then, in a twinkling, I heard from the roof
The dits and the dahs, from every spoof.
As I drew in my head, and was turning around,
Down the incinerator pipe Sgt Nicholas came with a bound.
His eyes twinkled! his dimples now merry!
Damn if he didn’t look like a fairy!
How in the hell did you get in here without any badge?,
The MP’s will be here soon and beat you like a rag.
The stump of a pipe he held tight in his teeth,
And the smoke it encircled his head like a wreath.
He had a broad face and a little round belly,
That shook when he laughed, like a bowlful of jelly!
You laugh now, shaking your fat belly
But us ASA guys will prove that we are not yellow
So I turned and threw a right as heavy as lead
And I caught him straight up side of his head
He spoke not a word, but went straight on his back,
Jugs of whiskey and bottles of beer came pouring from his pack.
He tired to stand but fell to his knees
I reached to help him but he said ”Screw you” Please.
You should have known I was Sargent Nicks
I go to all the Agency sites and visit all the tricks
But not any more, I have had my fun
I am too short for this my ETS is Jan1
(Guys that copied Morse code were nick named "Diddy Boopers)
A early Christmas present to all my friends from the 12th
Twas the Night before Christmas Poem..... McGoo Speaks
Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the ops
All the creatures was stirring, even those we called diddy bopps.
The cans(ear phones) were removed from their racks with care,
In hopes that St Nicholas soon would be there.
The diddy boppers were nestled snug in their chairs,
While visions of No QRM(static) danced in their lair.
And Sargent in his khakis, and I in my cap,
Had just come on duty, so no chance of a nap.
When up on the roof there arose such a clatter,
I jumped from the desk to see what was the matter.
Away to the snack bar I flew like a flash,
Tore open the door and gave it a smash.
With a little old soldier, so lively and quick,
I knew in a moment it must be Sgt Nick.
More rapid than eagles his coursers they came,
And he whistled, and shouted, and called us by name!
"Now Tom! now, Dennis! now, Mike and Billy!
On, John! On, Tozzie! on, on Stephen and Willy!
To the top of the roof! to the top of the wall!
Now dash away! Dash away! Dash away all!"
And then, in a twinkling, I heard from the roof
The dits and the dahs, from every spoof.
As I drew in my head, and was turning around,
Down the incinerator pipe Sgt Nicholas came with a bound.
His eyes twinkled! his dimples now merry!
Damn if he didn’t look like a fairy!
How in the hell did you get in here without any badge?,
The MP’s will be here soon and beat you like a rag.
The stump of a pipe he held tight in his teeth,
And the smoke it encircled his head like a wreath.
He had a broad face and a little round belly,
That shook when he laughed, like a bowlful of jelly!
You laugh now, shaking your fat belly
But us ASA guys will prove that we are not yellow
So I turned and threw a right as heavy as lead
And I caught him straight up side of his head
He spoke not a word, but went straight on his back,
Jugs of whiskey and bottles of beer came pouring from his pack.
He tired to stand but fell to his knees
I reached to help him but he said ”Screw you” Please.
You should have known I was Sargent Nicks
I go to all the Agency sites and visit all the tricks
But not any more, I have had my fun
I am too short for this my ETS is Jan1
7 Re: For Bob 12/24/2013, 12:08 am
Hospital Bob
Mr Ichi wrote:WWE Austin Texas. Bad Santa vrs Good Santa(Black guy Mark Henry good Santa) wins match and saves Christmas LOL
I love wrastlin. It's the only "reality tv" where the fans know it's fake. lol
8 Re: For Bob 12/24/2013, 12:09 am
Guest
Guest
Bob wrote:Mr Ichi wrote:WWE Austin Texas. Bad Santa vrs Good Santa(Black guy Mark Henry good Santa) wins match and saves Christmas LOL
I love wrastlin. It's the only "reality tv" where the fans know it's fake. lol
Whats fake?
9 Re: For Bob 12/24/2013, 1:28 am
Hospital Bob
Mr Ichi wrote:
Whats fake?
Wrastlin. But it's "fake" only in the sense that it's choreographed, scripted and contrived. What is not fake is it takes a lot of guts to get in those wrastlin rings. A lot more guts than any of those people on Duck Dynasty ever thought about having.
It all comes down to the two "D's". If I was ever attacked by Hells Angels or Al Qaeda, I'd want Dr. Death (David Schultz) watching my back. Not Dynasty Duck.
10 Re: For Bob 12/24/2013, 1:35 am
Hospital Bob
If he ever had to go up against this dude, old Dynasty Duck would be pissin in his pants.
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