A recently-closed Italian restaurant in Amarillo posted a passionate closing notice for the reading pleasure of its "sacks of goat sperm"... I mean, its former customers. Here's the lovely goodbye note's text in its entirety:
You sorry assed, rednecked sacks of goat sperm had no idea what you had here! Good luck with your pre-packaged frozen shit food in this town. Maybe you'll remember us when you're boning your sister and think she smells like pasta. We are off to make money in a town whose average IQ is above room temperature! CIAO!!!
The note blew up on Reddit, as these things are wont to do, and now this tender ode to Amarillo is available for all of us to enjoy.
The restaurant's mini-PR spin machine seems to already be fired up: "Don't believe all you hear and see folks!" a new status update on the business' Facebook page reads.
In an email to Grub Street, owner Mark Coffman claims the notice was a joke pulled by a former employee, and he's trying to deduce the culprit: "Nobody ever saw it up and it is not up now. It appears somebody put it up, took a pic and then took it down," he wrote.