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time is getting short

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451 Re: time is getting short on 10/24/2018, 5:53 pm

We will try ensure. However, like climate change, the trip point has already come and gone. I am uncertain how long I will be able to post. Some days zero challenges, while other days make this very difficult. Go to the breast cancer thread to see what else we are having to deal with.......I am physically and emotionally exhausted.

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452 Re: time is getting short on 10/24/2018, 6:11 pm

Conserve and get stronger.

My fried is going to her cancer surgeon Friday. Another positive node indicating colon cancer. 18 months ago she was cancer free. Her sister died three weeks ago with Mets... widespread. She died of renal failure prior to treatment.

It breaks my heart.

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453 Re: time is getting short on 10/25/2018, 1:39 am

2seaoat wrote: Go to the breast cancer thread to see what else we are having to deal with.......I am physically and emotionally exhausted.

OK damnitall, Sea, it's time to cut the chord with the breast cancer patient! I'm serious. You CANNOT deal with that stress right now, and it's just plain WRONG for you to be expected to. YOU should be the most important responsibility in your family right now, and just the fact that you mention emotional exhaustion says that woman is a drain on your waning resources.

Both you and Mrs. Sea need to seriously consider respectfully declining any further calls or visits from her, NOW and for the duration. I know this is not my business, but you have made it this forum's business to care about you.

So please listen to me this one time, Sea. You cannot save the world right now, much less this woman's sick self. She has a husband and perhaps other family or friends, and they will just have to take care of her themselves.

You can tell me to shove off and quit ordering you around, but such is not my intention. I'm just telling you how infuriating and worrisome it is to watch this drama that you DO NOT NEED in your life right now, taking such a toll.

It will take strength for you and Mrs. Sea to be rid of her, but I think you have little choice at this point.

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454 Re: time is getting short on 10/25/2018, 1:44 am

Joanimaroni wrote:Conserve and get stronger.

My fried is going to her cancer surgeon Friday. Another positive node indicating colon cancer.  18 months ago she was cancer free. Her sister died three weeks ago with Mets... widespread. She died of renal failure prior to treatment.

It breaks my heart.

Joani, I'm so terribly sorry to hear this.   It just sucks, big time. Sad  Will dearly hope your friend can beat this again.  I do know how rare and special true friends are at this stage in our lives....may she prevail against the insidious foe!

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455 Re: time is getting short on 10/25/2018, 8:25 am

Mrs Seaoat is taking her to Bunko tonight. Her email notice of the Bunko party interestingly did not have her email right. Other people are frustrated dealing with the mental decline. We do not abandon friends in their time of need, but this chit is getting beyond our skills.

We had a very troubling text late last night. My thirty six year old son just suddenly collapsed in his basement. He hit his head when the wife and kids were upstairs. DIL comes down the stairs after hearing him fall and finds him on the floor in a pool of blood and non responsive. The ambulance got him to the emergency room where they stitched and stapled the head wounds, but we have no idea how he fell, nor does he. My wife is going to call on him this morning, then she has to deal with some issues of my sil issues where he has asked her to stop by. He lost his mother to a sudden annueryism and has been suffering some depression which she is like his mother now. Then she has to deal with a mentally ill person who is not getting her cancer treated.

Do not ever expect that life cannot get more difficult. I am too weak to visit my son this morning, and could not be sustained with going with her for the entire day........she leaves at 11 am and I will not see her until around midnight. Her plate is full.

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456 Re: time is getting short on 10/25/2018, 8:45 am

Geez o pete. Hope your son is ok. Might just be blood sugar. Hopefully he gets tested comprehensively.

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457 Re: time is getting short on 10/25/2018, 10:56 am

RealLindaL wrote:
Joanimaroni wrote:Conserve and get stronger.

My fried is going to her cancer surgeon Friday. Another positive node indicating colon cancer.  18 months ago she was cancer free. Her sister died three weeks ago with Mets... widespread. She died of renal failure prior to treatment.

It breaks my heart.

Joani, I'm so terribly sorry to hear this.   It just sucks, big time. Sad  Will dearly hope your friend can beat this again.  I do know how rare and special true friends are at this stage in our lives....may she prevail against the insidious foe!


Staying positive. I will take her Friday and get the game plan.

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458 Re: time is getting short on 10/25/2018, 11:00 am

PkrBum wrote:Geez o pete. Hope your son is ok. Might just be blood sugar. Hopefully he gets tested comprehensively.

Seaoat, I agree with Pkr. He needs a complete work up for syncope and collapse. That should have been started in the ER.

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459 Re: time is getting short on 10/25/2018, 6:10 pm

2seaoat wrote:We do not abandon friends in their time of need,  but this chit is getting beyond our skills.

Not saying anyone should "abandon friends in their time of need," for Pete's sake - give me some credit for decency. But in case you haven't noticed (and it doesn't SOUND as if you're in denial), your situation is dire and your time on earth is growing shorter, and you can't be expected to bear someone else's burden right now, nor should Mrs. Sea.

As for the woman's problems being beyond your skills, EXACTLY. And not only your skills, but, very obviously, your emotional and physical energy as well.

Look, if Mrs. Sea wants to take her to Bunco to get away from you for a coupla hours, OK, but if she'd really rather be by your side, then she should damned well do that, and let her mentally ill "friend" make do with other supports.

OK, I'm done. You guys do it your way. Just please don't complain any more about what a burden that woman is becoming. If you and/or Mrs. Sea can't learn to say "No" at THIS stage in your lives together...well. Enough said. Again: your call.

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460 Re: time is getting short on 10/25/2018, 6:13 pm

I wish your magic wand could fix cancer, but until then we deal with cancer and mental illness as best we can.

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461 Re: time is getting short on 10/25/2018, 8:58 pm

2seaoat wrote:I wish your magic wand could fix cancer, but until then we deal with cancer and mental illness as best we can.

You'll excuse me, please, but I know all about it, Sea. There has been deadly cancer in my family (I'm a breast cancer survivor myself, so far, knock on wood, but not all family members have been so fortunate), plus my only sister has been in mental institutions since age 15 with a horrible, incurable schizophrenia, and my mother's family virtually all succumbed to Alzheimer's disease.

You don't need to tell me.

Obviously I don't have a magic wand, nor have I for one moment pretended to, so I don't know what you're talking about.

Look, if I didn't care two cents about you I wouldn't waste my time writing to ask you and Mrs. Sea to give up trying to help that poor sick woman right now. For her own sake, she needs professional help that neither of you can give. You know this. Meanwhile you waste precious time and energy that...
oh never mind. You know exactly what I mean, whether or not you agree.

I did, however, neglect to say I'm sorry about your son's fall and hope that it's not an indicator of anything seriously amiss.

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462 Re: time is getting short on 10/25/2018, 9:32 pm

He has been sick for about four weeks with a virus. The EMTs found no alcohol in his blood which we thought maybe he drank too much, but that was not it. He will be getting testing. Wife is not back from bunko yet so I will need to be further informed.

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463 Re: time is getting short on 10/27/2018, 11:18 am

Belly swollen beyond anything to date as liver fails. Very concerning infection in my belly button. We are treating it with topical antibiotics, but my gut feels like it will split. The Histamine release when I eat has me choking after about two bites. This has become quite horrible and I wish I could sugar coat it, but right when you think it cannot get more unpleasant, your belly button is on fire with a raging infection and every bite of food is choked off by your own body. I am not sure how long I will be able to contribute as the laptop is really heavy, and all of this is getting more difficult. I am at the ten day mark when the effects of the last radiation treatment start to moderate.......nothing but further descent into hell.

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464 Re: time is getting short on 10/27/2018, 11:24 am

Crying or Very sad

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465 Re: time is getting short on 10/27/2018, 12:20 pm

So sorry Seaoat. Do you know what kind of infection you are treating? It could be fungal.

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466 Re: time is getting short on 10/27/2018, 1:38 pm

So sorry Seaoat. Do you know what kind of infection you are treating? It could be fungal.

No we think it is an alien. I expect it to bust out of my gut and eat the dog, and then go looking for S. Weaver. I should have known when they beamed me up in the early seventies, that they put something in me.

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467 Re: time is getting short on 10/27/2018, 1:40 pm

2seaoat wrote:So sorry Seaoat. Do you know what kind of infection you are treating? It could be fungal.

No we think it is an alien.  I expect it to bust out of my gut and eat the dog, and then go looking for S. Weaver.  I should have known when they beamed me up in the early seventies, that they put something in me.

Love it Mr. Oats . . . . don't surrender my friend.

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468 Re: time is getting short on 10/29/2018, 10:04 am

I am tired. I have been using heating pads on my back and the cramping has gotten much better. I have decided I will no longer force solid foods down when my body starts the histamine attack when eating. I will eat small amounts and drink fluid. The relief from cramping last night let me sleep through the night. The only problem is the heating pad shuts off after ten minutes, and I have to be awake to reboot the pad. I just want to sleep without pain right now. Having difficulty getting off our handicap toilet. Fortunately we installed grab bars, but I have a real fear if I go to a public toilet which is not handicap, that I will need help to get off the toilet. Z showed me that putting some straps around my thighs will assist me raising from a chair or toilet. I will be working on that as the decline continues.

I had the granddaughters Sunday and I am just laughing my asz off. The fourth grader went to school on picture day and brought a blouse which she pulled down from her shoulders exposing both shoulders which in my daughter and wife's opinion was entirely inappropriate for a fourth grader and apparently some parents have called my daughter. Here is her class photo.



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469 Re: time is getting short on 10/29/2018, 3:48 pm

Kind of surprised whoever was in charge didn't question the drop shoulder thing or at least ask if mom was aware & OK with it.

That said, she is drop dead gorgeous! Nice smile to boot.  Obviously you're a proud grandpa!

Glad you're getting some relief from the heating pad. Don't forget the Ensure!

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470 Re: time is getting short on 10/29/2018, 4:12 pm

Don't forget the Ensure!

I can only get a half bottle down. I am at the stage where I stop all eating and take a few liquids. I did get in the Bobcat today because we have to fix the road before I pass. Wife had to get in the bucket and push my butt to get me up into the bobcat. I moved the rock over the drainage pipe and just cried from the pain. I am the person who went probably twenty years of my life without shedding a tear except for the death of friends and dogs. I am just constantly tearing now, as I was the tough guy, but cancer can make the toughest person become a helpless child unable to get off the toilet. I remember being appointed a GAL for a sixty five year old who was the toughest bar fighter in my town when I was growing up, he had two brothers and many a time the whole place would exploded in fist fights.....no guns.....no knifes.......just bad asz bare fist fighting. I remember seeing this once unbelievable tough guy crying in his bed as he realized he was dying and I had to sort out his affairs........He died. A legend in his time, quietly passing afraid and in pain. I have no illusions about what is coming, but I am finding out that tough is relative. My battle is easy compared to others, but I am getting angry and starting to want to get in a fascist's face and go to our local bar looking for trouble. It has been a year since I have been in the bar. Ten years ago it had rock music and friendly folks, now it is country music, hopelessness, hate and anger. It was my cheers......but now it is a collection of deplorables who spew hateful talk.......It is like all the f'ups in grade school have taken over the world......and I am tired of it. However, I do amuse myself thinking about my weak skeleton fighting some kid......Of course I will do none of it......anger is becoming a problem.

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471 Re: time is getting short on 10/29/2018, 4:22 pm


....anger is becoming a problem.



Anger is always a problem unless you feed off of it like the thing in our house does.

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472 Re: time is getting short on 10/30/2018, 10:12 am

2seaoat wrote:So sorry Seaoat. Do you know what kind of infection you are treating? It could be fungal.

No we think it is an alien.  I expect it to bust out of my gut and eat the dog, and then go looking for S. Weaver.  I should have known when they beamed me up in the early seventies, that they put something in me.

I bet Sigourney was there.

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473 Re: time is getting short on 10/30/2018, 11:54 am

2seaoat wrote: It has been a year since I have been in the bar.  Ten years ago it had rock music and friendly folks, now it is country music, hopelessness, hate and anger.  It was my cheers......but now it is a collection of deplorables who spew hateful talk.......It is like all the f'ups in grade school have taken over the world......and I am tired of it.

Sadly, some days that bar would seem a microcosm of the whole country -- and I'm tired of it, too. Sick of it, in fact.

Yes, there are pockets of light and hope, but it's getting harder to see and hear them among the clamor of the hateful MAGA crowd.

If this nation doesn't speak loud and strong at the polls next Tuesday, we have no one to blame but ourselves.



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474 Re: time is getting short on 10/30/2018, 1:42 pm

RealLindaL wrote:
2seaoat wrote: It has been a year since I have been in the bar.  Ten years ago it had rock music and friendly folks, now it is country music, hopelessness, hate and anger.  It was my cheers......but now it is a collection of deplorables who spew hateful talk.......It is like all the f'ups in grade school have taken over the world......and I am tired of it.

Sadly, some days that bar would seem a microcosm of the whole country -- and I'm tired of it, too.   Sick of it, in fact.

Yes, there are pockets of light and hope, but it's getting harder to see and hear them among the clamor of the hateful MAGA crowd.  

If this nation doesn't speak loud and strong at the polls next Tuesday, we have no one to blame but ourselves.












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475 Re: time is getting short on 10/30/2018, 3:12 pm

Your granddaughter is beautiful.

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