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Donald Trump is done by Garrison Keillor

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1 Donald Trump is done by Garrison Keillor on Tue Oct 31, 2017 11:00 am

When his old campaign manager was indicted Monday, Mr. Trump called me on the phone, crying like a baby, and begged me to endorse him. I said, "You're already president, Mr. President. You were elected." He said, "I'd still like your endorsement." I have a recording of the phone call. It's so sad. Donald Trump is done. He couldn't get elected dogcatcher in New York, his hometown. I was very very nice about it. Very nice. But New Yorkers love dogs and he does not. There are 14 recorded instances of him kicking small dogs, and I have documentary proof of all but two of them.

Plus many other instances of him running around grabbing women's cats. Knocked on the door, grabbed the cat, walked away. Just to show that a famous rich guy could get away with it. Where is the apology? No, the man couldn't even get a job as a school crossing guard in New York. Look at him leading his grandchildren toward the helicopter — thank God there's a Marine there to keep them from walking into the rotor.

He's very wary of children, afraid they'll pull off the wig. It's from La Bouffant on 8th & 45th, 3rd floor. Horsehair. Palomino filly. I have receipts.

Trump shot a man on Fifth Avenue last year just to see if he could get away with it and he did. His base said, "Well, some people just need to be shot, that's all. As a warning to the others." Why is he so hung up on virility? Because the Army rejected him on account of bone spurs that you get from wearing high heels. Everybody knows that.

Just look at how he salutes the Marine honor guard — TOTAL DISASTER — it's not a salute, it's a little yoo-hoo. Uniforms are a huge turn-on for him. And when he salutes the flag, he doesn't even look at it. Total disrespect for the flag. And the salute is very weak in the wrists. Know why there's ABSOLUTELY NO video of him hitting a golf ball? Because (pardon me for being politically incorrect) he swings like a girl. And when he slices it into the parking lot, he tees up another ball. Mr. Mulligan. Mr. Multi-Mulligan.

He sits at that ridiculous little desk in the Oval Office and signs a presidential proclamation as if he's Kim Jong Un or something and he holds it up like a kid holding up his school project that his mama wrote for him. The man can barely read, that's why he hates TelePrompter. Total lightweight.

He is NOT A NICE PERSON and so the name Trump is as popular as herpes these days. Trumpet players have taken up the cornet. Card players refer to the lead suit as the jump suit. Tramps prefer to be called hoboes, town dumps are now refuse heaps, and girls named Dawn are becoming Cheryls. To residents of his crummy building on Fifth Avenue, it's now known as Chump Tower because it's caused so much grief and tragedy for people. It wasn't constructed — it was fabricated. FABRICATED. Plywood modules shipped down from Canada and installed by minimum-wage temps from Hoboken. I can prove this. I have documentation. The wind whistles through the tower at night, roaches the size of rats. Ask anybody.

People who voted for him are humiliated. So his ratings have tanked. The same people who admire him tend to drive Dodge Darts and wear sweatshirts from schools they didn't attend. Nobody stays in his hotels except foreign CEOs and their tootsies. He is weak. Weak on #s, weak on 1st Amendment, worst president in history. Failed @ real estate and now @ politics. His record = BAD. First president in my lifetime who DOES NOT KNOW the words to "The Star-Spangled Banner." The lips are not even moving.

He quit holding rallies in stadiums because nobody wants to go hear a loser brag about his manliness for an hour, you can hear that in any barroom. Only places he can draw a crowd are rural areas where billboards are riddled with bullet holes, shot by men angry because they can't read. He is so over. Totally irrelevant, exhausted, flamed out. The sleepytime eyes and la-di-da hair and the tweet-tweet-tweet say it all. Real men don't tweet. Ask anybody. We bark, we protest, we thunder, condemn, denounce, we give 'em hell, sometimes we post. Wimps tweet. And now the perps are going to start walking and talking. And the fat lady is waiting in the wings.

Washington Post

Garrison Keillor is an author and radio personality.



http://www.chicagotribune.com/news/opinion/commentary/ct-manafort-donald-trump-tweets-20171030-story.html

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2 Re: Donald Trump is done by Garrison Keillor on Tue Oct 31, 2017 11:06 am

Trash

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3 Re: Donald Trump is done by Garrison Keillor on Tue Oct 31, 2017 11:09 am

Joanimaroni wrote:Trash



Some members like Keillor.

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4 Re: Donald Trump is done by Garrison Keillor on Tue Oct 31, 2017 11:53 am

Telstar wrote:Some members like Keillor.

Me, for instance--Keillor's a national treasure.

JoaniDouchebag doesn't get it. The ability to appreciate satire and irony is directly related to intelligence. She's, to put it bluntly, too stupid to get it. She thinks you're actually supposed to eat the Irish babies and doesn't understand how all the kids in Lake Woebegone can be above average. SAD!

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5 Re: Donald Trump is done by Garrison Keillor on Tue Oct 31, 2017 1:08 pm

Telstar wrote:
Joanimaroni wrote:Trash



Some members like Keillor.

I think, instead of writing out what she was actually going to say, she decided to avoid grammar mistakes and condense it down to its essence.   Usually when I read something she's written, I'm thinking "why, this is nothing but crap."  But "trash" works, too.  It's Joani shorhand.

Very Happy



Last edited by zsomething on Tue Oct 31, 2017 3:34 pm; edited 1 time in total

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6 Re: Donald Trump is done by Garrison Keillor on Tue Oct 31, 2017 3:01 pm

Deus X wrote:
Telstar wrote:Some members like Keillor.

Me, for instance--Keillor's a national treasure.


Ditto. Makes at least three of us, including Tel.

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7 Re: Donald Trump is done by Garrison Keillor on Tue Oct 31, 2017 3:07 pm

Telstar wrote:People who voted for him are
Joanimaroni wrote:Trash

Thank you.

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8 Re: Donald Trump is done by Garrison Keillor on Tue Oct 31, 2017 4:09 pm

Sal wrote:
Telstar wrote:People who voted for him are
Joanimaroni wrote:Trash

Thank you.

BINGO!

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9 Re: Donald Trump is done by Garrison Keillor on Tue Oct 31, 2017 4:30 pm

Classless. I'd enjoyed his show and thght he had more character than that.

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10 Re: Donald Trump is done by Garrison Keillor on Tue Oct 31, 2017 8:12 pm

Sal wrote:
Telstar wrote:People who voted for him are
Joanimaroni wrote:Trash

Thank you.




lol! lol! lol!

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11 Re: Donald Trump is done by Garrison Keillor on Wed Nov 01, 2017 12:29 pm

Anybody know where to get a giant spolight?   If you turn it into a Bat Signal and project the Obama "O" into the night skies over Washington D.C, I'll give you a dollar...

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12 Re: Donald Trump is done by Garrison Keillor on Wed Nov 01, 2017 8:39 pm

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14 Re: Donald Trump is done by Garrison Keillor on Wed Nov 29, 2017 4:35 pm

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15 Re: Donald Trump is done by Garrison Keillor on Wed Nov 29, 2017 8:50 pm

Yeah, it's true. He admitted touching a woman's BACK. I'm a woman and I've looked in the mirror to see if there are any hidden sex organs back there that my hubby and I have missed out on enjoying through the years, and I can't find a single one of them. There's some moles and way too much cellulite, but not a vagina to be found!!!!!!! I must be deformed. I'm glad I didn't find THAT out until now when I'm too old to care anyway. It could have really screwed up my psyche.

Get this- they were making fun on WCOA this morning that the "me-too" movement's accusations of sexual assault have now extended to touching a woman's back. Even the stupid conservative radio station understands the difference in sexual assault and touching a woman's back.

Keiller says he touched the woman's back because he wanted to pat her as she was upset about something. She jerked and he realized she was surprised. He apologized and they were friends for years after, in fact, until her lawyer came to his door recently.

Right Now I am ashamed to be a woman. To see the lives and careers that some of these men have worked so hard for be destroyed because a man touched a woman's back or PRETENDED to touch her breasts in a picture makes me sick.
And by the way, that WAS a funny article, but I'm suspecting it was the one that he wrote day before yesterday defending Al Franken that got some right wing organization to pay her to make the allegation against Keiller. I'm convinced from the men being charged lately that this is going on, especially since Roger Stone actually has seen some of the stuff before it became public. This is Republican filth and nothing more.

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